Couple’s fight like anything when the holidays approach about totally mundane issues, like how the toilet paper is rolled, who should take out the trash, whether the lights are turned on or off, etc. It’s not the big stuff they are fighting about, but small stuff. Their fights escalate because they don’t understand the undercurrents, pressure and stress they are dealing with.
It is such a paradox and we love helping couples move through their struggle into shedding the light.
Many couples can’t figure out why they keep fighting about the small stuff and why they make such a big deal about it. What they can’t see is that there are pressing expectations behind the small fights, needs that are not being met. Many couples are so focused on buying tangible gifts for each other that they forget that giving intangible gifts can be the richest, most cherished gifts given and received!
Here’s some ways you can begin to diffuse the energy when you are fighting so you can actually feel and experience the generosity of the season!
Tips for Holiday Giving:
When you are fighting breathe and slow down. This is how you begin to become attentive to what is behind the fight, the story and the tension.
Ask your partner, “I am interested in knowing why it matters to you that ____________ (i.e. I turn off the lights, I do the dishes that way, I leave the keys in your shoes etc)? Tell me your story.”
Begin to get curious about your partners perspective and be attentive.
Dialogue and discover the intangible gifts you both really desire and be willing to give and receive them.
Acknowledge when you have given your partner a gift and they’ve given to you. Notice the difference between offering it as gift verses meeting an expectation.
Remember you’ll need to continue to communicate your perspective and desires to your partner. Your partner will probably not remember what you’ve asked for. Gifts are requested and given in the present. Unarticulated expectations become the trigger for a fight.
Acknowledge the gift you’ve both given to your partner and the one you have received.
Broadcast with enthusiasm “I just gave you a gift, did you notice my gift? I just turned off the lights because I know it matters to you. Wow, right now, I gave you my ‘you matter to me’ gift.” Make it a big deal. Make the energy of your gifting bigger than the energy you put into your fight – make receiving of the gift broad and bigger than the energy you put into the fight. Celebrate giving and receiving your intangible gifts. Celebrate yourselves. Choose your intangible inner joy!
What Are Some Intangible Gifts You Can Give Your Loved One?
A week of neck and/or back rubs.
Cleaning up the kitchen.
Shampooing the carpet.
Taking out the trash.
Breakfast in bed
A poem, song, art work, and a collection of jokes you put together
Preparing their special dish or dessert
When are fighting with your loved one, we encourage you to look underneath the small stuff, attend and discover what you truly want to give, receive and share with each other.
Feel free to share here by posting your comment of some of the intangible gifts that you’d like to give the one you love.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
5 Ways to Overcome the Holidays, Even if Your Life is Hard
If you have had a tough time this year, due to job loss, illness, the financial crisis, or other heartbreak, you may be dreading the holiday season. These tips from the authors of Overcomers, Inc: True stories of hope, courage, and inspiration will help you cope:
1. Make taking care of yourself and needs your number one priority this year. While it is good to care for others, in times of stress, it is easy to get overwhelmed by too much done on other’s behalf. You have permission to be giving of TLC to yourself and to receive from those who give to you.
2. Get enough rest. If you are feeling sad or stressed, those feelings will intensify if you don’t get enough rest. Be sure you have enough time to recharge your batteries.
3. Create some new traditions. If this is the first year that you’ll face the holidays after the death of a loved one or post layoff, don’t pretend that life is the same and force yourself to do all the things you’ve always done. Keep the traditions that feel good to you with at least one new thing that you will enjoy. New traditions bring more positive energy into the holiday season.
For example, a tradition that began when a family member was going through a lot of adversity was NO buying of material gifts more than $2. Better yet, creative presents from the heart is better. It was the most exciting Christmas day we had filled with gift wrapped containers made from recycled materials with heartfelt joy bursting to be discovered. Our children "shopped" in their own closets, made cards, drawings...and the most important was discovering how much joy, love and thoughtfulness went into the present.
4. Ask for help. If you’ve always entertained people with a full course dinner but just don’t feel up to it or can’t afford it, let your loved ones know. Suggest a pot luck meal, let another family member host the event this year, or have a movie nut with simple snacks. Match your energy level and your budget to what you can do, not what you’ve always done. You'll be amazed at the Spirit of sharing that gets created.
5. Reach out to others in need. No matter how awful you may feel your life is, there are folks in a more difficult situation. Sending an afternoon visiting a nursing home, volunteering in a food pantry, or sending a care package to a member of the military will lift your spirits and help you feel needed.
1. Make taking care of yourself and needs your number one priority this year. While it is good to care for others, in times of stress, it is easy to get overwhelmed by too much done on other’s behalf. You have permission to be giving of TLC to yourself and to receive from those who give to you.
2. Get enough rest. If you are feeling sad or stressed, those feelings will intensify if you don’t get enough rest. Be sure you have enough time to recharge your batteries.
3. Create some new traditions. If this is the first year that you’ll face the holidays after the death of a loved one or post layoff, don’t pretend that life is the same and force yourself to do all the things you’ve always done. Keep the traditions that feel good to you with at least one new thing that you will enjoy. New traditions bring more positive energy into the holiday season.
For example, a tradition that began when a family member was going through a lot of adversity was NO buying of material gifts more than $2. Better yet, creative presents from the heart is better. It was the most exciting Christmas day we had filled with gift wrapped containers made from recycled materials with heartfelt joy bursting to be discovered. Our children "shopped" in their own closets, made cards, drawings...and the most important was discovering how much joy, love and thoughtfulness went into the present.
4. Ask for help. If you’ve always entertained people with a full course dinner but just don’t feel up to it or can’t afford it, let your loved ones know. Suggest a pot luck meal, let another family member host the event this year, or have a movie nut with simple snacks. Match your energy level and your budget to what you can do, not what you’ve always done. You'll be amazed at the Spirit of sharing that gets created.
5. Reach out to others in need. No matter how awful you may feel your life is, there are folks in a more difficult situation. Sending an afternoon visiting a nursing home, volunteering in a food pantry, or sending a care package to a member of the military will lift your spirits and help you feel needed.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Overcomers Inc.: Authors Blog Tour Interview of Phil and Lalei
October 24, 2009 Overcomers Authors Blog Tour Interview
Philip R. Belzunce, Ph.D., ND, LSMFT, RPE, CPC, MH and
Lalei E Gutierrez-Belzunce Ph.D., LSMFT, RPE, CPC
Philip Belzunce Ph.D., ND, LSMFT, RPE, CPC, MH, integrative psychologist, naturopath, holistic life/relationship coach, marriage/family therapist, diversity consultant, international lecturer, energetic bodyworker, hypnotherapist, iridologist, martial artist, Taoist teacher, married priest, is an eternal student of life. He authored What Really Matters is the Heart, and Heart Shadows. He derives great satisfaction in serving with a Higher Purpose, facilitating individuals, couples, families and groups through life transitions and transformations for growth, healing, and well-being, . To know more of his collaborative teamwork with his wife/partner, go to www.tenpathwaysofhealinglove.com, www.phillalei.com to find out how to reconnect with your body-emotion-energy-mind-soul-spirit (BEEMSS) Life Journey.
Lalei E. Gutierrez Ph.D., LSMFT, RPE, CPC is a holistic psychologist, life/relationship and spiritual coach, couples system and diversity consultant whose practice reflects her love and gratitude to serve with a Higher Purpose, individuals, couples, families, groups and the world community through their life journeys, transitions, aspirations, transformative process and well-being. She integrates Gestalt therapy, energy body process work, couples and family systems process, diversity, imagery, dreamwork, EFT, EMDR, TaiChiChiKung, polarity, soulwork and spirituality in her work To learn of her collaborative body-emotion-energy-mind-spirit process and practice (BEEMSS) method, check www.PhilLalei.com, and their e-book for Healing Love relationships www.TenPathwaysofHealingLove.com
1. How did you get started writing?
Phil: I started writing for my soul’s journey in a journal during grieving my mother’s death in 1994. I shared my journal a year later with Lalei, who encouraged me to publish “What Really Matters is the Heart”. Another book, “Heart Shadows” began upon my father’s death in 1998. Both books were spiritually moved and flowed. It was a healing process to write them. When Spirit gifted us a dog, a process on its own, Lalei and I co-authored a children’s book, “Once upon a Doggie” which we completed one Sunday morning, when we had a joyful collective dream.
Lalei: writing for me was professional for workshops and classes we teach. But the stirrings and encouragements to write our stories and what we can contribute had been there coming as a sense of restlessness, a message from Spirit knocking in our dreams and comments from people. The time has when we said ‘YES”, a writing coach and editor(s) showed up in 2008, and an email from Lynne to write for Overcomers INC came in bold PRINT…no more to be postponed.
2. What do you do when you are not writing?
Phil: professionally, Lalei and I have our holistic and integral private practices individually and together, wherein we coach individuals, couples, groups, families. We are energetic body process and polarity practitioners. We also train and consult with health care practitioners, teach diversity professionals, coach, lead workshops in diversity, ten pathways of healing love for individuals and couples, facilitate holistic growth groups for individuals and couples and consult and coach with small family businesses. We are faculty of the Gestalt Institute, Diversity Management Program at Cleveland State University and with the Ohio Institute of Energetic Studies and Bodywork. I also practice as a naturopath. Lalei co-leads women’s Goddess groups.
Lalei: Personally, we are now grandparents of 4 of our own and 9 from our siblings. We value living and practicing a holistic and integral life and relationship style of being. We practice what we teach and see ourselves as a healing partnership of love, transforming our world by first transforming ourselves. Our day involves daily meditation, prayer, fitness, wellness and healing exercises as yoga, chi kung, pilates, movement. We are choiceful in preparing mostly living raw foods and foster health awareness for ourselves, our community and our environment. We are involved in the service of health, healing and wellness and supporting others to have options for their empowerment, growth and freedom.
3. What would readers like to know about you?
We are a conscious marrying (use present tense vs past tense in ‘married’) couple,
passionate about our healing partnership, being the microcosm in a macrocosm of the world’s pattern of relations. We see our contribution as being choicefully transformative in our process, and how that may impact generations to come, starting with our family to be healing presences of love, overcoming adversities that strengthen individuals, couples, families, groups, communities in harnessing co-creatively and collaboratively.
4. What inspired you to be a contributing author in Overcomers, Inc.,
Phil: When we were invited by Lynne, we knew that it was time to share our stories of Overcoming Adversity…and from which we draw our Soul’s Higher Purposes and our Spiritual Journey in this earth.
Lalei: I am inspired to be a contributing author of Overcomers, Inc. and join other overcomers at a time when the current world situation in almost every level of society and our country is undergoing massive adversities shaking all levels of system and the world as we know. I am honored to be part of this endeavor and contribute to bring Light and Healing Love in our world community.
5. Why is the topic of Overcoming important to you?
Lalei: Overcoming is important to me as a process of Coming Over to the Call of Spirit to live authentically and with integrity. Adversities present themselves in our lives as opportunities for us to hear the Call– to face our fears, de-structure and heal unhealthy beliefs, connect within deeply, to learn forgiveness of ourselves and of others, to touch our spiritual essences, to connect with our Higher Purpose of Love and know the Links of our unique Being-ness to our ONEness as a Global humanity. Overcoming renews our relationship with the Divine Love that embraces us all and see us through to discover the miracles of the ever-Present moment. Through overcoming adversity, I come close to God. As Mother Teresa has said, “she meets God in every human soul being she serves.”
6. Why are you specially qualified to write about this topic?
We, individually and as a couple, have Overcome adversities that spanned, familial, cultural, religious, diversity, social, political, economic, personal, relational realms. Perhaps destiny has trained us by the circumstances we each have faced in our lives, we have also taken these adversities to propel us in fields of study, taking the opportunities for understanding the soul, studying human behavior, in psychology, family therapy, relational and group dynamics, energetic studies, metaphysics, hypnosis, holistic health, healing therapies. We have been in combined practice for more than 50 years…and have help so many overcome adversities.
7. How many books have you written?
1. our dissertations (unpublished)
2. Choices of the Heart (unpublished)
3. Pairs Polarity in Significant Relationships: Becoming Aware of our Interpersonal Elements (manuscripts)
4. 2 published: Heart Shadows, and What Really Matters is the Heart
5. 1 E-book
6. Chapters of Phil and Lalei in Overcomers are just the tip of the ice-berg.
We are encouraged by many to write our personal couple story…we have
chapters here and there.
7. BEEMSS
8. What are the titles of your books and what genres are they?
Belzunce, Phil, What Really Matters is the Heart (hard copy) translated to e-book
In this heartfelt and life-affirming novel, Phil Belzunce, relationship psychologist share with us his journey of grieving the death of his mother. He tenderly shares his passage along the pathways of healing, laying out for the reader the profound impact of our primal ties to our mothers. Here we are guided into the windows of healing in the depths of our soul, teaching us when we can embrace the grieving process, we actually join with the forces of life.
Belzunce, Phil, Heart Shadows, (hard copy) novel translated to e-book
Heart Shadow’s takes us on the journey of a couple’s struggle facing and moving through life’s challenges. Here we discover how thiscouple receives the news of the wife’s medical diagnosis and their journey of healing. The author, Phil Belzunce beautifully weaves for us real-life recollections of his own healing journey breathtakingly laying out for us our own levels of insight, awareness and forgiveness on our own paths of discovery.
Belzunce, Phil & Gutierrez, Lalei, Once Upon a Doggie, (hard copy) translated to e-book
This refreshing children’s novel is a puppy’s lively journey to discover both who he is and how he gives back to our world.
Once Upon a Doggie teaches us to be ourselves, exactly as we are and that is our greatest gift and our contribution.
Belzunce, Phil & Gutierrez, Lalei, Ten Pathways of Healing Love: A Journey of Transformation (e book) www.tenpathwaysofhealinglove.com.
Imagine having a guidebook for your intimate relationship, one that will help you gracefully move through the challenges in your partnership
9. How do you manage to keep yourself focused and on track when you’re writing a book?
We have an editor-word designer who keeps us on track. We meet regularly. We share what is present and what is in our minds-heart-spirit regarding the pathway on hand, she records what we are saying, and send it back to us in an email. It stimulates our us to write and send it back to her. The process has been going on for a year now and we hope to see this process soon complete and on line.
10. Do you write to make money, for the love of writing or both?
We write for Love and Passing on Forward. We write to share and inspire others and as Spirit moves us. We would welcome the energetic flow of money to fund the cause of Healing Love for couples and families and the co-creation of Healing Love for the transformation of our world to one of peace and love where love can hold the diversity of life and the global heart beats for All.
11. What makes you proud about your involvement with Overcomers, Inc.?
Being part of an international group of authors who are making a difference in the world, through Overcoming Adversity with Grace and Transforming our world.
12. Will you write more books? YES Definitely.
13. What does the future hold for you and your books?
We would like to see a book written by couples and families who have overcome adversity together. There are special dynamics involved in couples that lend themselves to overcoming adversity in their journey of love and transformation.
(Lynne and Kathleen – we would love to do this with you).
14. What makes this a book that other people MUST read and WHY?
It is uplifting and inspiring. It is a companion for those going through their dark night of the soul. It comforts to know that in adversity is the possibility for one’s calling. It is a support to know that other have made it through and we are not alone.
15. What people NEED to read this book and WHY?
- search for meaning
- different perspectives…seeing out of the box
- creative ideas
- soulful moments
- silent retreats
- compassionate understanding
- inspiration
- empowering encouragement
- supports
16. What sparks your creativity? Any tips to help others spark their own creativity?
Movement, music, play, silence, meditation, nature, out of the box, haiku,
Brainstorming, laughter, dialogical process in groups, calling upon my spirit guides,
Listening to my Dreams. Etc
17. What do you think motivates people to become authors? What motivated you to get into this unusual industry?
People like Lynne, Kathleen --- supports
18. Tell me about the most unusual things you have done to promote any books?
We brought our dog to signings…and he knew how to attract folks.
19. If a potential reader thinks that your book wouldn't interest them, what would you say to convince them to buy? I'm thinking something better than "Its the greatest book ever." Give me something more specific :)
We usually tell a story as to what brought us to write the book and our energy and excitement…and how we were moved and touched.
20. What is your final message to our readers?
May you find the blessings of higher purpose, love, joy, growth, healing, well-being, gratitude and peace in overcoming the adversities that grace your life journey. May you truly know in your tissues, cells, in your bones and in your soulful spirit, that All the Universe is truly here on your side with Love.
To get your own copy of Overcomers, Inc.,True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiring AND enjoy dozens of wonderful gifts with your purchase go to
http://phillalei.com
Philip R. Belzunce, Ph.D., ND, LSMFT, RPE, CPC, MH and
Lalei E Gutierrez-Belzunce Ph.D., LSMFT, RPE, CPC
Philip Belzunce Ph.D., ND, LSMFT, RPE, CPC, MH, integrative psychologist, naturopath, holistic life/relationship coach, marriage/family therapist, diversity consultant, international lecturer, energetic bodyworker, hypnotherapist, iridologist, martial artist, Taoist teacher, married priest, is an eternal student of life. He authored What Really Matters is the Heart, and Heart Shadows. He derives great satisfaction in serving with a Higher Purpose, facilitating individuals, couples, families and groups through life transitions and transformations for growth, healing, and well-being, . To know more of his collaborative teamwork with his wife/partner, go to www.tenpathwaysofhealinglove.com, www.phillalei.com to find out how to reconnect with your body-emotion-energy-mind-soul-spirit (BEEMSS) Life Journey.
Lalei E. Gutierrez Ph.D., LSMFT, RPE, CPC is a holistic psychologist, life/relationship and spiritual coach, couples system and diversity consultant whose practice reflects her love and gratitude to serve with a Higher Purpose, individuals, couples, families, groups and the world community through their life journeys, transitions, aspirations, transformative process and well-being. She integrates Gestalt therapy, energy body process work, couples and family systems process, diversity, imagery, dreamwork, EFT, EMDR, TaiChiChiKung, polarity, soulwork and spirituality in her work To learn of her collaborative body-emotion-energy-mind-spirit process and practice (BEEMSS) method, check www.PhilLalei.com, and their e-book for Healing Love relationships www.TenPathwaysofHealingLove.com
1. How did you get started writing?
Phil: I started writing for my soul’s journey in a journal during grieving my mother’s death in 1994. I shared my journal a year later with Lalei, who encouraged me to publish “What Really Matters is the Heart”. Another book, “Heart Shadows” began upon my father’s death in 1998. Both books were spiritually moved and flowed. It was a healing process to write them. When Spirit gifted us a dog, a process on its own, Lalei and I co-authored a children’s book, “Once upon a Doggie” which we completed one Sunday morning, when we had a joyful collective dream.
Lalei: writing for me was professional for workshops and classes we teach. But the stirrings and encouragements to write our stories and what we can contribute had been there coming as a sense of restlessness, a message from Spirit knocking in our dreams and comments from people. The time has when we said ‘YES”, a writing coach and editor(s) showed up in 2008, and an email from Lynne to write for Overcomers INC came in bold PRINT…no more to be postponed.
2. What do you do when you are not writing?
Phil: professionally, Lalei and I have our holistic and integral private practices individually and together, wherein we coach individuals, couples, groups, families. We are energetic body process and polarity practitioners. We also train and consult with health care practitioners, teach diversity professionals, coach, lead workshops in diversity, ten pathways of healing love for individuals and couples, facilitate holistic growth groups for individuals and couples and consult and coach with small family businesses. We are faculty of the Gestalt Institute, Diversity Management Program at Cleveland State University and with the Ohio Institute of Energetic Studies and Bodywork. I also practice as a naturopath. Lalei co-leads women’s Goddess groups.
Lalei: Personally, we are now grandparents of 4 of our own and 9 from our siblings. We value living and practicing a holistic and integral life and relationship style of being. We practice what we teach and see ourselves as a healing partnership of love, transforming our world by first transforming ourselves. Our day involves daily meditation, prayer, fitness, wellness and healing exercises as yoga, chi kung, pilates, movement. We are choiceful in preparing mostly living raw foods and foster health awareness for ourselves, our community and our environment. We are involved in the service of health, healing and wellness and supporting others to have options for their empowerment, growth and freedom.
3. What would readers like to know about you?
We are a conscious marrying (use present tense vs past tense in ‘married’) couple,
passionate about our healing partnership, being the microcosm in a macrocosm of the world’s pattern of relations. We see our contribution as being choicefully transformative in our process, and how that may impact generations to come, starting with our family to be healing presences of love, overcoming adversities that strengthen individuals, couples, families, groups, communities in harnessing co-creatively and collaboratively.
4. What inspired you to be a contributing author in Overcomers, Inc.,
Phil: When we were invited by Lynne, we knew that it was time to share our stories of Overcoming Adversity…and from which we draw our Soul’s Higher Purposes and our Spiritual Journey in this earth.
Lalei: I am inspired to be a contributing author of Overcomers, Inc. and join other overcomers at a time when the current world situation in almost every level of society and our country is undergoing massive adversities shaking all levels of system and the world as we know. I am honored to be part of this endeavor and contribute to bring Light and Healing Love in our world community.
5. Why is the topic of Overcoming important to you?
Lalei: Overcoming is important to me as a process of Coming Over to the Call of Spirit to live authentically and with integrity. Adversities present themselves in our lives as opportunities for us to hear the Call– to face our fears, de-structure and heal unhealthy beliefs, connect within deeply, to learn forgiveness of ourselves and of others, to touch our spiritual essences, to connect with our Higher Purpose of Love and know the Links of our unique Being-ness to our ONEness as a Global humanity. Overcoming renews our relationship with the Divine Love that embraces us all and see us through to discover the miracles of the ever-Present moment. Through overcoming adversity, I come close to God. As Mother Teresa has said, “she meets God in every human soul being she serves.”
6. Why are you specially qualified to write about this topic?
We, individually and as a couple, have Overcome adversities that spanned, familial, cultural, religious, diversity, social, political, economic, personal, relational realms. Perhaps destiny has trained us by the circumstances we each have faced in our lives, we have also taken these adversities to propel us in fields of study, taking the opportunities for understanding the soul, studying human behavior, in psychology, family therapy, relational and group dynamics, energetic studies, metaphysics, hypnosis, holistic health, healing therapies. We have been in combined practice for more than 50 years…and have help so many overcome adversities.
7. How many books have you written?
1. our dissertations (unpublished)
2. Choices of the Heart (unpublished)
3. Pairs Polarity in Significant Relationships: Becoming Aware of our Interpersonal Elements (manuscripts)
4. 2 published: Heart Shadows, and What Really Matters is the Heart
5. 1 E-book
6. Chapters of Phil and Lalei in Overcomers are just the tip of the ice-berg.
We are encouraged by many to write our personal couple story…we have
chapters here and there.
7. BEEMSS
8. What are the titles of your books and what genres are they?
Belzunce, Phil, What Really Matters is the Heart (hard copy) translated to e-book
In this heartfelt and life-affirming novel, Phil Belzunce, relationship psychologist share with us his journey of grieving the death of his mother. He tenderly shares his passage along the pathways of healing, laying out for the reader the profound impact of our primal ties to our mothers. Here we are guided into the windows of healing in the depths of our soul, teaching us when we can embrace the grieving process, we actually join with the forces of life.
Belzunce, Phil, Heart Shadows, (hard copy) novel translated to e-book
Heart Shadow’s takes us on the journey of a couple’s struggle facing and moving through life’s challenges. Here we discover how thiscouple receives the news of the wife’s medical diagnosis and their journey of healing. The author, Phil Belzunce beautifully weaves for us real-life recollections of his own healing journey breathtakingly laying out for us our own levels of insight, awareness and forgiveness on our own paths of discovery.
Belzunce, Phil & Gutierrez, Lalei, Once Upon a Doggie, (hard copy) translated to e-book
This refreshing children’s novel is a puppy’s lively journey to discover both who he is and how he gives back to our world.
Once Upon a Doggie teaches us to be ourselves, exactly as we are and that is our greatest gift and our contribution.
Belzunce, Phil & Gutierrez, Lalei, Ten Pathways of Healing Love: A Journey of Transformation (e book) www.tenpathwaysofhealinglove.com.
Imagine having a guidebook for your intimate relationship, one that will help you gracefully move through the challenges in your partnership
9. How do you manage to keep yourself focused and on track when you’re writing a book?
We have an editor-word designer who keeps us on track. We meet regularly. We share what is present and what is in our minds-heart-spirit regarding the pathway on hand, she records what we are saying, and send it back to us in an email. It stimulates our us to write and send it back to her. The process has been going on for a year now and we hope to see this process soon complete and on line.
10. Do you write to make money, for the love of writing or both?
We write for Love and Passing on Forward. We write to share and inspire others and as Spirit moves us. We would welcome the energetic flow of money to fund the cause of Healing Love for couples and families and the co-creation of Healing Love for the transformation of our world to one of peace and love where love can hold the diversity of life and the global heart beats for All.
11. What makes you proud about your involvement with Overcomers, Inc.?
Being part of an international group of authors who are making a difference in the world, through Overcoming Adversity with Grace and Transforming our world.
12. Will you write more books? YES Definitely.
13. What does the future hold for you and your books?
We would like to see a book written by couples and families who have overcome adversity together. There are special dynamics involved in couples that lend themselves to overcoming adversity in their journey of love and transformation.
(Lynne and Kathleen – we would love to do this with you).
14. What makes this a book that other people MUST read and WHY?
It is uplifting and inspiring. It is a companion for those going through their dark night of the soul. It comforts to know that in adversity is the possibility for one’s calling. It is a support to know that other have made it through and we are not alone.
15. What people NEED to read this book and WHY?
- search for meaning
- different perspectives…seeing out of the box
- creative ideas
- soulful moments
- silent retreats
- compassionate understanding
- inspiration
- empowering encouragement
- supports
16. What sparks your creativity? Any tips to help others spark their own creativity?
Movement, music, play, silence, meditation, nature, out of the box, haiku,
Brainstorming, laughter, dialogical process in groups, calling upon my spirit guides,
Listening to my Dreams. Etc
17. What do you think motivates people to become authors? What motivated you to get into this unusual industry?
People like Lynne, Kathleen --- supports
18. Tell me about the most unusual things you have done to promote any books?
We brought our dog to signings…and he knew how to attract folks.
19. If a potential reader thinks that your book wouldn't interest them, what would you say to convince them to buy? I'm thinking something better than "Its the greatest book ever." Give me something more specific :)
We usually tell a story as to what brought us to write the book and our energy and excitement…and how we were moved and touched.
20. What is your final message to our readers?
May you find the blessings of higher purpose, love, joy, growth, healing, well-being, gratitude and peace in overcoming the adversities that grace your life journey. May you truly know in your tissues, cells, in your bones and in your soulful spirit, that All the Universe is truly here on your side with Love.
To get your own copy of Overcomers, Inc.,True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiring AND enjoy dozens of wonderful gifts with your purchase go to
http://phillalei.com
Friday, October 23, 2009
Miracle of Love:
Our Journey with Overcomers, Inc.
Lalei E. Gutierrez and Philip R. Belzunce
When we were invited by Lynne Klippel to contribute each of our chapters to the newly published book, Overcomers, Inc.: True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration, we had no idea what was in store for us! We never thought we would embark into yet another process of overcoming. This had been for us an exciting, reflective, opening, co-creating and celebrative experience. All this has happened for us at the same time we have been writing our e-book -- The Ten Pathways of Healing Love: a Journey of Transformation.
During this time of writing, we have found ourselves reviewing our personal life journeys and our relationship journey as a couple. We have also been exploring and reflecting on the evolution of humanity's consciousness and spirituality evolution --the relationships between people, communities, cultures and countries.
We stand in awe of the mysteries and miracles of life. We are astounded at the polarities of experiences, as well as, the adversities and challenges that have led us into amazing discoveries, learning, and growth. We are honored to contribute to the heart-mind-spirit of our world.
Now, more than ever, we are feeling the shifts in consciousness, inviting us into open fields of conversation, sharing and connection.
We are finding that courage is no longer a lonely and secret process, where one blazes through a treacherous trail to survive, to seek one’s higher purpose, to reclaim one’s health, soul or spirit, and/or to answer a call of grace. Courage or lack of it is no longer a virtue to be affirmed upon a person’s demise.
What has stood out for us the most when reading all of the stories in Overcomers is the courage it takes to share one’s story. Did you know that the root of the word COURAGE in French comes from “couer” which means heart?
We all know that it takes heart to have courage. Let’s look at what courage really means.
C - Challenge or Crisis occurs when human beings have some kind of
challenge or crisis caused by either an internal or an external situation or
event.
O – Obstacles will be experienced including feelings of fear, shame,
rejection,criticism.
U – In their Uncertainty they will Uncover an Underlying
mystery.
R – Risk, Resources, Reflection and a Review of patterned
Reactions will occur.
A – Abilities (mental, emotional, physical, spiritual) will be unearthed.
G – Grace will be Given through others kindness, support,
synchronicities, and the unexpected.
E - Exploring new horizons and the Embracing of new discoveries
appears.
Such courage, propelled by HOPE, inspires others (38 authors stories) to know that through it all, one has to:
• Let go,
• Surrender to the moment,
• Seek and find,
• Listen to one’s intuition,
• Answer to the call of their heart,
• Breathe,
• Trust,
• Believe,
• Reclaim oneself, and
• Let God do the driving.
We honor all our amazing co-authors that we have joined together with in this project and process. Though we may not know each other in person, we have all connected with the global HEART call and have been brought together for a Higher Purpose.
Together, we co-created with COURAGE to LOVE.
Overcomers is chock full of stories of hope, courage and inspiration. We see this book as an example of co-creating in the higher purpose of Healing Love, to inspire everyone to know that adversity can be overcome and transformed.
With Love and Gratitude,
Lalei and Phil
To Purchase Overcomers, Inc., True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration (from Amazon) and to claim nearly 100 free gifts from noted transformational leaders such as Wayne Dyer, Christine Kloser, Chris and Janet Atwood and more . please visit: http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch for more information.
Lalei E. Gutierrez and Philip R. Belzunce
When we were invited by Lynne Klippel to contribute each of our chapters to the newly published book, Overcomers, Inc.: True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration, we had no idea what was in store for us! We never thought we would embark into yet another process of overcoming. This had been for us an exciting, reflective, opening, co-creating and celebrative experience. All this has happened for us at the same time we have been writing our e-book -- The Ten Pathways of Healing Love: a Journey of Transformation.
During this time of writing, we have found ourselves reviewing our personal life journeys and our relationship journey as a couple. We have also been exploring and reflecting on the evolution of humanity's consciousness and spirituality evolution --the relationships between people, communities, cultures and countries.
We stand in awe of the mysteries and miracles of life. We are astounded at the polarities of experiences, as well as, the adversities and challenges that have led us into amazing discoveries, learning, and growth. We are honored to contribute to the heart-mind-spirit of our world.
Now, more than ever, we are feeling the shifts in consciousness, inviting us into open fields of conversation, sharing and connection.
We are finding that courage is no longer a lonely and secret process, where one blazes through a treacherous trail to survive, to seek one’s higher purpose, to reclaim one’s health, soul or spirit, and/or to answer a call of grace. Courage or lack of it is no longer a virtue to be affirmed upon a person’s demise.
What has stood out for us the most when reading all of the stories in Overcomers is the courage it takes to share one’s story. Did you know that the root of the word COURAGE in French comes from “couer” which means heart?
We all know that it takes heart to have courage. Let’s look at what courage really means.
C - Challenge or Crisis occurs when human beings have some kind of
challenge or crisis caused by either an internal or an external situation or
event.
O – Obstacles will be experienced including feelings of fear, shame,
rejection,criticism.
U – In their Uncertainty they will Uncover an Underlying
mystery.
R – Risk, Resources, Reflection and a Review of patterned
Reactions will occur.
A – Abilities (mental, emotional, physical, spiritual) will be unearthed.
G – Grace will be Given through others kindness, support,
synchronicities, and the unexpected.
E - Exploring new horizons and the Embracing of new discoveries
appears.
Such courage, propelled by HOPE, inspires others (38 authors stories) to know that through it all, one has to:
• Let go,
• Surrender to the moment,
• Seek and find,
• Listen to one’s intuition,
• Answer to the call of their heart,
• Breathe,
• Trust,
• Believe,
• Reclaim oneself, and
• Let God do the driving.
We honor all our amazing co-authors that we have joined together with in this project and process. Though we may not know each other in person, we have all connected with the global HEART call and have been brought together for a Higher Purpose.
Together, we co-created with COURAGE to LOVE.
Overcomers is chock full of stories of hope, courage and inspiration. We see this book as an example of co-creating in the higher purpose of Healing Love, to inspire everyone to know that adversity can be overcome and transformed.
With Love and Gratitude,
Lalei and Phil
To Purchase Overcomers, Inc., True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration (from Amazon) and to claim nearly 100 free gifts from noted transformational leaders such as Wayne Dyer, Christine Kloser, Chris and Janet Atwood and more . please visit: http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch for more information.
Overcomer's Inc: 3 Book Reviews/endorsements
“Overcomers, Inc. crosses all borders of life. It doesn't matter where you live, the color of your skin, or the state of your physical health. There are times when life throws you a curve ball and you feel all alone. Overcomers, Inc. is your companion during those tough times. Reading these stories will inspire you and offer you hope - hope that you'll overcome your tough time in life. This is one of those books I strongly recommend to all my patients.” ~ Dr. Michael Kaye, DrMichaelKaye.com.
“Overcomers, Inc. is an eminently readable series of true tales, written by people of all ages and backgrounds. All have confronted adversity in one form or another and prevailed. While deceptively simple, this volume contains deep truths about how to rise above calamity, seeing the good instead of the bad, maintaining hope despite despair, and recognizing that gratitude and forgiveness are truly empowering. Read this book! You will not only enjoy it, but will find yourself empowered to go beyond some crushing realities which hold you down or bring you low. These tales, depicting the impact of faith in God’s goodness, coupled with a belief in one’s innate human resilience, will inspire you and enable you to overcome perennial overwhelm. Instead, these memorable, heartwarming vignettes will help you attain your dreams in ways you never thought possible.”
~Rabbi Ed Weinsberg, Ed.D., D.D. Author of Conquer Prostate Cancer: How Medicine, Faith, Love and Sex Can Renew Your Life ConquerProstateCancer.com
“At the end of reading the beautiful poignant stories, the first word that came to my mind was “Wow!” These are extraordinary and brave stories….not only inspiring, but soul stirring. Each one of these narratives is proof that there is a choice to co-create with Source that will inevitably bring healing. All the authors had the trust, willingness, and courage to make that choice, and surrender to the mystery of life’s unfolding, demonstrating how tragedies, illness, disappointment and betrayal can be shape-shifted into miracles. It is a noble book not only for these unprecedented turbulent times, and serves as a beacon of hope for all of us in the human condition.” ~ Max Wellspring, TheWellSpringSolution.com.
To get your own copy and receive dozens of bonus gifts go to http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
“Overcomers, Inc. is an eminently readable series of true tales, written by people of all ages and backgrounds. All have confronted adversity in one form or another and prevailed. While deceptively simple, this volume contains deep truths about how to rise above calamity, seeing the good instead of the bad, maintaining hope despite despair, and recognizing that gratitude and forgiveness are truly empowering. Read this book! You will not only enjoy it, but will find yourself empowered to go beyond some crushing realities which hold you down or bring you low. These tales, depicting the impact of faith in God’s goodness, coupled with a belief in one’s innate human resilience, will inspire you and enable you to overcome perennial overwhelm. Instead, these memorable, heartwarming vignettes will help you attain your dreams in ways you never thought possible.”
~Rabbi Ed Weinsberg, Ed.D., D.D. Author of Conquer Prostate Cancer: How Medicine, Faith, Love and Sex Can Renew Your Life ConquerProstateCancer.com
“At the end of reading the beautiful poignant stories, the first word that came to my mind was “Wow!” These are extraordinary and brave stories….not only inspiring, but soul stirring. Each one of these narratives is proof that there is a choice to co-create with Source that will inevitably bring healing. All the authors had the trust, willingness, and courage to make that choice, and surrender to the mystery of life’s unfolding, demonstrating how tragedies, illness, disappointment and betrayal can be shape-shifted into miracles. It is a noble book not only for these unprecedented turbulent times, and serves as a beacon of hope for all of us in the human condition.” ~ Max Wellspring, TheWellSpringSolution.com.
To get your own copy and receive dozens of bonus gifts go to http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
Overcomers, Inc., Inspiring Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration
Overcomers, Inc: True stories of hope, courage, and inspiration will give readers the knowledge and emotional resilience to face the most difficult times of life by sharing inspiring stories of triumph.
You will find this a book of diversity. There are many authors, from many walks of life. However, they all share a common bond. They triumphed over tragedy and gleaned wisdom in this process. While this is not a religious book, there are stories full of faith, of many kinds and flavors. It is funny how in your darkest times, faith often becomes your brightest light.
All of the contributors to this book want to encourage you to hold tight to your belief that a better day will come. It is their sincere desire to pass along what they’ve learned through their own trials, to make your journey easier.
This is our 38 Courageous Amazing Overcomers Authors and their compelling stories of hope, courage and inspiration. http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
Section 1- Hope
Mary Hayes-Bridges, When Tough Times Hit, There Is Always HOPE
Martha Lee Bohn , Coincidence is God's Way of Remaining Anonymous
Nancie Benson , One Size Does Not Fit All
Kathleen Gage , Second Chances,
Lauren Salamone , Listen to What Your Heart Already Knows
Steven Rotz , When All Else Fails, There is Magic
Barbara McCollough , When Grace Comes to Get You
Karen Keeney , My Crazy, Beautiful Life Makeover
Nachhi Randhawa , Finding My Purpose Through Adversity and Practical Experience
Marifran Korb , The Weed That Broke Through the Sidewalk
Julio Blanco , Decide and Go Seek: Overcoming Life’s Chronic Little Challenges to Let Your Purpose Shine Through
Susan Hampton , I Am Experiencing "N.O.W."–(New Omnipotent Ways)
Marlene Oulton , Getting Older(and Over!) The "Not Enough" Syndrome-
Catherine Newton , Create A Magical Life: Tap Into Your Soul's Intention of Abundance
Section 2- Courage
Frances Thomas , The Awesome Power of Optimism: A Personal Journey to HOPE
Christine Kloser, Saying Good-bye to a Business I Loved Holly Eburne , Surrender To The Moment
Joshua Aragon, How Big Is Your Tent? One Man's Quest to Find the Answer for More, More, More
Nelie Johnson , Calling of the Heart
Colleen Bain , Remember to Stop and Just Breathe
Lalei E. Gutierrez , The Call to Trust and Believe in Healing Love
Amelie Chance , How the Airline Safety Speech Saved My Life
Rev. Rita “MeKila” Herring , When Your Intuition Calls, Answer the Phone!
Lynne Klippel , The Waiting Room Miracle
Kimberly Martin , Willy Loman, I Am Not!
Leela Francis, The Dance of The Sacred Sensual Me
Virginia Fischer, 140 Boxes…. More Than a Ton of Ancient History
Nancy Cotter , Are You Credit Worthy?-
Section 3- Inspiration
Paula Morand , When the Rain Falls
Tomar Levine , Growing Up After Fifty: It's Never Too Late to Bloom
Scott Cunningham , How Do I Get Out Of Here?
Catherine Van Wetter , A Time of Grief - A Time of Peace
Philip Belzunce , Transformative Power of Intimacy
Corrine Ropp , Forgiveness - The Key to Unlocking Your Prison
Margaret Sarkissian , Starting Over: A Journey of Loss and Recovery
Colleen Russell , Awakening to Her True Self
Charlon Bobo , From Trauma To Triumph: One Woman's Empowering Journey From Fragmented Child to Conscious Entrepreneur
Jan Janzen , Let God Do the Driving
http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
You will find this a book of diversity. There are many authors, from many walks of life. However, they all share a common bond. They triumphed over tragedy and gleaned wisdom in this process. While this is not a religious book, there are stories full of faith, of many kinds and flavors. It is funny how in your darkest times, faith often becomes your brightest light.
All of the contributors to this book want to encourage you to hold tight to your belief that a better day will come. It is their sincere desire to pass along what they’ve learned through their own trials, to make your journey easier.
This is our 38 Courageous Amazing Overcomers Authors and their compelling stories of hope, courage and inspiration. http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
Section 1- Hope
Mary Hayes-Bridges, When Tough Times Hit, There Is Always HOPE
Martha Lee Bohn , Coincidence is God's Way of Remaining Anonymous
Nancie Benson , One Size Does Not Fit All
Kathleen Gage , Second Chances,
Lauren Salamone , Listen to What Your Heart Already Knows
Steven Rotz , When All Else Fails, There is Magic
Barbara McCollough , When Grace Comes to Get You
Karen Keeney , My Crazy, Beautiful Life Makeover
Nachhi Randhawa , Finding My Purpose Through Adversity and Practical Experience
Marifran Korb , The Weed That Broke Through the Sidewalk
Julio Blanco , Decide and Go Seek: Overcoming Life’s Chronic Little Challenges to Let Your Purpose Shine Through
Susan Hampton , I Am Experiencing "N.O.W."–(New Omnipotent Ways)
Marlene Oulton , Getting Older(and Over!) The "Not Enough" Syndrome-
Catherine Newton , Create A Magical Life: Tap Into Your Soul's Intention of Abundance
Section 2- Courage
Frances Thomas , The Awesome Power of Optimism: A Personal Journey to HOPE
Christine Kloser, Saying Good-bye to a Business I Loved Holly Eburne , Surrender To The Moment
Joshua Aragon, How Big Is Your Tent? One Man's Quest to Find the Answer for More, More, More
Nelie Johnson , Calling of the Heart
Colleen Bain , Remember to Stop and Just Breathe
Lalei E. Gutierrez , The Call to Trust and Believe in Healing Love
Amelie Chance , How the Airline Safety Speech Saved My Life
Rev. Rita “MeKila” Herring , When Your Intuition Calls, Answer the Phone!
Lynne Klippel , The Waiting Room Miracle
Kimberly Martin , Willy Loman, I Am Not!
Leela Francis, The Dance of The Sacred Sensual Me
Virginia Fischer, 140 Boxes…. More Than a Ton of Ancient History
Nancy Cotter , Are You Credit Worthy?-
Section 3- Inspiration
Paula Morand , When the Rain Falls
Tomar Levine , Growing Up After Fifty: It's Never Too Late to Bloom
Scott Cunningham , How Do I Get Out Of Here?
Catherine Van Wetter , A Time of Grief - A Time of Peace
Philip Belzunce , Transformative Power of Intimacy
Corrine Ropp , Forgiveness - The Key to Unlocking Your Prison
Margaret Sarkissian , Starting Over: A Journey of Loss and Recovery
Colleen Russell , Awakening to Her True Self
Charlon Bobo , From Trauma To Triumph: One Woman's Empowering Journey From Fragmented Child to Conscious Entrepreneur
Jan Janzen , Let God Do the Driving
http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Transformative Power of Intimacy
Philip Belzunce, Ph.D., ND, RPE, LSMFT, CPC
One of the lessons that I have learned so vividly can be compared to the sun in the sky. Some days, especially in winter, we may see only the dark clouds and believe with conviction in the delusion that the sun is not present. But just because the bright sun is entirely obscured by the dark clouds, it does not mean that the sun is not there shining.
I learned that no amount of preaching for world peace will ultimately create a harmonious humanity if any of us are still divided within. Through self-discovery and healing in body, emotions, mind, and spirit, to fully embrace my soul journey, I have transformed, with forgiveness and love, past fears and pains, to claim the joy I am living in my present and into my future. I am allowing myself to fully embrace a loving world.
Through experiences of “dying,” I learned the value of living. Though my body was threatened, my spirit became alive. I am now in a space of being truly grateful for how my past experiences have transformed how I perceive life. I believe that my gratitude helps me support my clients in a true theology of liberation through the process of integrating body, mind, and spirit.
From Overcomers, Inc.; True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration. To get your own copy and receive dozens of bonus gifts go to http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
One of the lessons that I have learned so vividly can be compared to the sun in the sky. Some days, especially in winter, we may see only the dark clouds and believe with conviction in the delusion that the sun is not present. But just because the bright sun is entirely obscured by the dark clouds, it does not mean that the sun is not there shining.
I learned that no amount of preaching for world peace will ultimately create a harmonious humanity if any of us are still divided within. Through self-discovery and healing in body, emotions, mind, and spirit, to fully embrace my soul journey, I have transformed, with forgiveness and love, past fears and pains, to claim the joy I am living in my present and into my future. I am allowing myself to fully embrace a loving world.
Through experiences of “dying,” I learned the value of living. Though my body was threatened, my spirit became alive. I am now in a space of being truly grateful for how my past experiences have transformed how I perceive life. I believe that my gratitude helps me support my clients in a true theology of liberation through the process of integrating body, mind, and spirit.
From Overcomers, Inc.; True Stories of Hope, Courage and Inspiration. To get your own copy and receive dozens of bonus gifts go to http://www.overcomersbook.com/booklaunch
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